Stuck In My World
by PuppyNoelle
Summary: Rurouni Kenshin & Final Fantasy 7; Cloud, Aeris, Kenshin, and Kaoru get stuck in my world, and are forced to stay at my house! What will happen? PG-13 for strong language.
1. Chapter 1

**Stuck In My World**

**by: Miss Battousai Noelle**

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Kenshin, Kaoru, Aeris, or Cloud; and I have basically no money, and I'm not 18 yet, so you couldn't sue me anyways! Ha! I do own myself, so HA!

**Description:** Cloud, Aeris, Kenshin, and Kaoru get stuck in my world, and are forced to stay at my house! What will happen? How will we find modern clothes for Kenshin and Kaoru to wear when the authoress has no money? All this, and much, much more.

**Chapter 1:**

Noelle: Heeeey! Welcome!

Kenshin: (pokes computer monitor with the tip of his finger) What is this Noelle-dono? There's strange little things that are moving around on it, that there are.

Noelle: It's called a computer you stupid rurouni from the late 1800's Japan!!!

Kenshin: Oro? C... com... puter?

Noelle: Yes. It stores information, and it can send that information to other people all across the world using a thing called the internet.

Kenshin: Wow....

Cloud: You are _really_ behind on the times man. We got nuclear bombs and stuff in this time period.

Kenshin: Well we have gunpowder.

Cloud: Gunpowder, shmunpowder. Nuclear bombs could destroy the whole world in one or two shots.

Kenshin: ORO?!

Noelle: Exactly, and America is the most powerful country in the world... sadly.. we're so pathetic and full of people who don't care about anything but themselves and how big their pocketbooks are. Honor doesn't exist, and neither does chivalry. Both of which i personally think should exist.

Aeris: Hear hear! Chivalry is a thing that all men should do for their women, right Cloud-chan?

Cloud: Uh... whatever you say Aeris.

Aeris: Teeheehee... Your so sweet Cloud! (hugs him)

Cloud: (can barely breathe) Aeris... can't.... breathe....

Aeris: Ooops! (lets him go) sorry sugarplum.

Cloud: Whatever.... and don't call me "sugar plum" i ain't some kinda fairy you know.

Aeris: (pouts) I can call you _whatever_ I want to _sweetcheeks_!

Cloud: NOOOOOO!!! The dreaded pet-names! BEWARE ALL PEOPLE THAT ARE SANE!!!!

Kaoru: Well, I guess that wouldn't include me, now would it, lol! Oh, Kenshin!!

Kenshin: Oro? What is it Kaoru-dono?

Kaoru: (grabs his ear) _You_ forgot to cook lunch!! So _i_ had to cook, and sit there and listen to Yahiko and Sanosuke complain about my cooking _again_!!! And meanwhile, what are you doing? You're standing around here, in Noelle's bedroom, messing with her stuff, and having a casual conversation with people!!!!

Kenshin: Gomen nasai Kaoru-dono!!!! I didn't mean to, that I did not.

Kaoru: Hmph! _Sure you didn't_!!

Kenshin: I am being honest Kaoru-dono, that i am... Onegai (Please) believe me......

Kaoru: You still need to be punished.

Kenshin: (cowers in fear, for Kaoru is the only thing in the whole world that the ex-hitokiri (manslayer/assassin) fears) Onegai iie!! (Please no!!) Kaoru-dono!! Onegai don't hit me Kaoru-dono!!!

Noelle: (whispers to Kenshin) Maybe she'll not punish you if you tell her you love her, Kenshin.

Kenshin: (whispers to Noelle) Hai (yes), that may work... (turns to Kaoru, just as she's about to smack his head with his Sakabato (reverse-blade sword).) Kaoru-dono I swear my eternal love to you!! Please don't hit me!!!!

Kaoru: (abruptly stops, with the sword a centimeter from the top of his head.) D... do you mean it, Kenshin?

Kenshin: Hai Kaoru-dono.

Kaoru: (drops the sword then jumps around in glee) Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yippee!!!!!! (she then latches her arms onto his shoulders.) I love you too Kenshin!!!!!!!! Hey, how about we go home, ne? It's getting a little late, and Yahiko and Sanosuke will be really pissed off if you don't cook dinner for them.

Kenshin: Hai Kaoru-dono.

Cloud: We should probably get going home too.

Aeris: Yeah.

Noelle: Wait a sec.

All: Nani? (What?)

Noelle: Heh heh... Uh... now that you people are here, you uh, kinda can't leave.

All: NANI?!?!!

Noelle: (scratches her head) Gomen nasai... demo... (but...) I don't know how to send you all back, i only figured out how to get you here.

Cloud: Holy crap... That's not good.

Kenshin: That it isn't...

Kaoru: Oh well. This can only mean one thing...

Aeris: ...Sleepover!!

Noelle: With two guys here too?! They're gonna have to sleep in the hallway!

Aeris: And, we're gonna have to find Kaoru and Kenshin-san some modern clothing... since, uh... nobody in America walks around wearing kimonos (traditional Japanese outfit), gis and hakamas (gi-shirt, hakama-pants) in this day and age.

Noelle: Your right. But I'm broke...Well.... Kaoru is no problem, she's probably wears the same size I do, so she can borrow some of my clothes.

Kaoru: What about Kenshin?

Noelle: Uh....... Oh geez... he _definitely _wouldn't fit in my dad or my brother's clothes. My dad's clothes'd be too long, and my brother's would be too wide.

Aeris: (giggling) Is your little brother a little... chubby?

Noelle: A _little_? I think 'little' is an understatement.

Cloud: Then how come you're so skinny? You're like a toothpick.

Noelle: I have a much higher metabolism, and I don't spend every single minute of my day in front of the television screen watching TV or playing videogames for hours on end.

Cloud: Oh.

Noelle: Yes, you see my point

Kaoru: Wouldn't Kenshin fit in some of your clothes Noelle? I mean, he _is_ the same exact height you are, and he's small enough.

Noelle: I guess... I do have some guys' clothes anyways. Of course, he'll have to wear the black jeans, cuz those are my only guys' jeans. And I have a few baggy guys' T-shirts he can wear too.

Aeris: Perfect!

Noelle: Okay, (opens closet) we'll just put aside one of the pairs of black jeans, and.... let's see... ah! And my Final Fantasy 9 t-shirt. That'll work. Okay, Kaoru, you have permission to raid my closet.

Kaoru: Yay! (walks over to closet, and goes through all the clothes, finally picking out a pair of flare jeans and a grey w/ black rimmed t-shirt with a picture of Mickey Mouse doing a handstand on it. (a/n: I LOVE that shirt!).) I pick this outfit!

Noelle: Okey dokey. Now one at time, take the clothes, go into the bathroom, and go change.

Kaoru: I'll go first. ^_^ (goes in, changes quickly, and comes back out.)

Aeris: You look nice Kaoru. ^-^

Kaoru: Thanx ^_~

Aeris: No problem! ^-^

Noelle: Your turn Kenshin.

Kenshin: Demo... I like my clothes, that i do.

Noelle: (rolls her eyes) Kenshin you dork.

Kaoru: Kenshin, just wear the dang clothes; it won't kill you, and it's not like they're dirty or anything, cuz they're clean.

Kenshin: Demo--

Kaoru: NOW!!

Kenshin: Hai! (runs into the bathroom before Kaoru can hit him. Comes out a few minutes later, with the change of clothes on.)

Aeris: Aw... he looks so cute! Like a little kid almost. How adorable!

Kenshin: ......I don't like it...

Cloud: Hey, don't complain, and just take it like a man.

Noelle: Exactly. And it's not like I made you wear girl's clothes, ne?

Kenshin: Demo--

Kaoru: NE?!

Kenshin: Demo.....

Kaoru: IIE!!! NO arguing Kenshin-baka!

Kenshin: (cowers) Hai Kaoru-dono...

Kaoru: Good.

Noelle: So...... Does anybody wanna watch a movie? We can play one of my DVDs on my PS2.

Aeris: Ooooo, that sounds like fun.

Cloud: I guess...

Kaoru/Kenshin: A... movie?

Noelle: Oh, hehe, it's just like a play, except it's recorded, and then put onto a DVD or VHS, so that people can watch it in their own homes on their DVD or VHS players.

Kaoru/Kenshin: Oh.

Kaoru: That sounds like fun. I love plays.

Noelle: Great! Ooo... you are gonna LOVE this movie. It's called _Legally Blonde_. It's _really_ hilarious.

Aeris: Yeah! I love that movie!

Noelle: I know, it's a classic with me and my best friends.

Aeris: Yup! The _perfect _chick flick.

Cloud: (becomes frightened.) Did you just say... chick flick?

Noelle/Aeris: Hai.

Cloud: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Chick flicks were created by fuzzy little girly faeries to bring utter joy to girls, but maniacal torture to guys... It's evil I tell you; evil!!!

Aeris: Oh get over it Cloud. You'll like this one, I promise. It's absolutely hilarious.

Kenshin: ......I hope you're right Aeris-dono.

Aeris: Ah, but of _course_ I'm right Kenshin-san! Just ask Noelle.

Noelle: She's right.

Aeris: See? (giggles)

Kaoru: Okay, so... can we watch it now?

Noelle: Yup. (Gets up, and starts the movie.)

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Mwahahaha!! That's the end of the totally pointless 1st chapter! Thanx 4 reading!

Please review... you _know_ you wanna...

~^-^x~


	2. Chapter 2

**Stuck In My World**

**by: Miss Battousai Noelle**

**Disclaimer: **See first chapter

**Author's rant: **I'm not in very good mood right now... i should be, cuz the only homework i have to do this weekend is Pre-Calc, but my parents are gonna sell my car! Nooooo... I'm not quite 16 yet, but I will be in few months, but my parent's are gonna sell it! So I'm all depressed-like and angry-like right now. It's not cool. I'm gonna try not to let my bad mood ruin this chapter though. I will try to keep it happy and funny for my readers. Anyways... on to chapter 2.

**Chapter 2:**

The movie has just ended. Kenshin, had dozed off while sitting in my blue butterfly chair, and had a very content Kaoru sitting on his lap, leaning into him. Cloud and Aeris were sitting on the floor by the TV, and I was lying on my bed. Aeris and I sang through a few of the songs at the end and during the credits. Cloud, surprising himself, had enjoyed the movie, but refused to admit it.

Aeris: Admit it Cloud, you liked the movie.

Cloud: No way. It was a chick flick, and chick flicks are evil.

Kaoru: Oh, come on, it was a good movie, ne Kenshin?

Kenshin: zzz...

All: sweatdrop

Noelle: He fell asleep. Stupid git. I don't know how he _could_ fall asleep, cuz this is the kind of movie that keeps you laughing almost non-stop.

Aeris: Yeah, and everyone, _but_ him was laughing almost non-stop..

Cloud: He's lucky he didn't have to put up with watching it.

Aeris: Oh get over your stupid ego and accept the fact that you liked the movie.

Cloud: No. I don't want to.

Aeris: You're hopeless...

Noelle: Lol. Maybe we should wake Kenshin up.

Kaoru: Yup. But how?

Noelle: Oooo, I have an idea.

All: What?

Noelle: I'll just blare one of my CDs on my karaoke machine. Heh heh... that'll get him awake for sure!

Aeris: Oooo... Noelle that's brilliant!

Noelle: Hee hee... Okay, (grabs CD case) which CD... hmmm... it's gotta be something loud... Aha! I've got it! I shall play my Less Than Jake CD!

Cloud: Less Than Jake, I've heard of them, they're a ska band that performs songs with really hilarious lyrics right?

Noelle: ^_^ Yup! And they're one of my fave bands of all time!

Aeris: I like ska bands because of the trumpets.

Noelle: Lol.

Kaoru: 'Ska'? What's that?

Noelle: It's type of music, sometimes it's considered a type of punk rock.

Kaoru: Oh.

Noelle: Yeah, now let's wake Kenshin!

All: Yeah.

Noelle puts the CD into the karaoke machine, then presses the play button. All of a sudden a loud _boom_ from a bass is heard, and Kenshin wakes with a start.

Kenshin: Who's there?! Show yourself!

Cloud: sweatdrop And I thought _I_ was paranoid!

Kao/Aer/Noel: giggle

Kenshin: (looks around and realizes that no one is attacking him as he hears the girl's giggles.) Oro? What's that noise?

Kaoru: giggle it's called 'music' Kenshin.

Kenshin: Oro? _This_ is music?

Noelle: Grr! How DARE you insult one of my favorite bands!!!

Kenshin: ORO!!! Gomen nasai Noelle-dono!

Noelle: Grr... I you hadn't apologized I would've kicked your sorry little rurouni ass upside-down and inside-out.

Cloud: Can you really do that?

Noelle: Duh.

Cloud: But isn't he stronger than you?

Noelle: I don't care! I'll still beat him to a pulp! And it's not like he's gonna do anything about it, ne?

Cloud: You've gotta point.

Noelle: Of course I do, I'm probably the smartest person here, mwahahaha!

Kaoru: I don't think so.

Noelle: Why not?

Kaoru: I think Kenshin's smarter.

Noelle: I know he can speak Japanese, that's a given, but can he speak English fluently, speak good amount of Spanish, and speak a little bit of German too? Oh, and has he ever memorized a song in Latin before? Huh? Oh, and can he augment matrices? Or solve systems of equations? Can he give the chemical formula for ammonium hydroxide? Can he tell me how many different valences Iron has? Can he define all the archetypal symbols and situations for me? I don't think so!

Aeris: Did anybody follow a thing she said.

Ken/Clo/Kao: Nope.

Noelle: Mwahahaha! I am the smartest!! Yay... And I'm probably the most talented singer here too, but we'll leave that argument for another day. ^_^

All: roll eyes

Noelle: Oh shut up. So I got a little bit of an ego when it comes to singing; I can't help it, singing is in my blood.

Cloud: Whatever...

Noelle: Okay, fine, new subject.

Kaoru: Finally.

Aeris: So, what are we gonna do now?

Noelle: Oooo, idea! Why don't I teach everybody one of my really fun dances routines?

Kao/Aer: Oooo, that sounds like fun!

Cloud: You can count me _out_!

Kenshin: I'd rather not, gomen.

Noelle: Oh fine you party poopers!

Kao/Aer: Party poopers!

Cloud: I don't care what you call me.

Noelle: Oh forget them girls, their just stupid boys who don't know how to have fun.

Kaoru: Your right.

Aeris: Uh hu.

Noelle: We'll make them sing later though.

Kenshin: ORO?!

Cloud: NANI?!

Kaoru: Oh get over it.

Aeris: How about we do the singing and skip the dancing?

Kaoru: Yeah, that's a good idea. What do you think Noelle?

Noelle: I like that idea. He he he... let the torture begin!

Kao/Aer: Yes!

Ken/Clo: NOOOO!!!

Kao/Aer/Noel: Yes!!!

Ken/Clo: No!!!

Kao/Aer/Noel: Yes!!!!

Ken/Clo: Please no!!!!

Kao/Aer/Noel: YES!!!

Aeris: It's 3 to 2, so the girls win.

Ken/Clo: No......

Noelle: Oh cheer up! It'll be fun! And we'll sing big happy group songs so nobody'll have to sing solo unless they want to, okay?

Ken/Clo: ........................... okay.................

Aeris: Yippee!

Kaoru: Yay!

Noelle: Fun time!

Over the next several hours, many songs were sung. The girls sang very cheerfully, while the boys, well... they refused to give it much effort, so their parts sounded awful, but it was fun for the girls nonetheless. After the singing fest, everyone was pretty worn out, so it became "watch TV and become couch potatoes" time.

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The end to another totally pointless chapter. Yay... And I feel much happier now that this chapter has been finished. Yay... I will probably update this totally crazy story everyday or every other day just to let you know. Oh, and I'm still working on all my other stories while I'm doing this one. This story is purely here for me to relieve my underlying stress and rage through slapstick comedy everyday. ^_~x

~Please review! Luv u all! Peace and Love!~

^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x~^-^x


	3. Assistance Needed!

ASSISTANCE IS NEEDED! HELP NEEDED!

The beloved authoress needs some ideas for this story... please give me some!

Battousai: We _know_ you need help Noelle.

Noelle: Shut up! (chains Battousai to the wall by his wrists and binds his ankles together with chains.) Bad dog!

Battousai: Hey! That's not very nice!

Noelle: That's what you get for implying that i have mental issues, cuz i don't!

Battousai; Oh shut up.

Noelle: YOU! (smacks his scarred cheek)

Battousai: OUCH! _That_ was _rude!_

Noelle: Oh, get over yourself. And you'd better be nice to me if you want me to let Kaoru come in here.

Battousai: (snaps to attention at the sound of Kaoru's name) Ok, I'll be good.

Noelle: (pats his head) Good boy. Anyways, would someone be ever-so-kind as to give my brain a jumpstart? If you would, I would be very grateful. Thanx ^_~x


	4. Chapter 3

**Stuck In My World**

**by: Miss Battousai Noelle**

**Disclaimer: **see chapter one

**Author's Rant: ** I'm all happy-like right now. I talked to my choir teacher about a scheduling problem i had for second semester, and she said that i could audition to go into the second highest choir at my school! And I'm in the second lowest choir right now, so that's very good news. Yay! I just gotta audition and hope i make it. Wish me good luck! ^_~x Oh, and a big thanx to Ravenf6 for giving my brain a jumpstart! And another thanx to all other pplz who reviewed! HUGS FOR ALL!! Can you tell I'm in a good mood? Lol!

**Chapter 3:**

About midnight that night, the house is like a never ending party, as one of my Good Charlotte CDs is blaring, everybody is jumping up and down, singing along, and just having a good time. That is, until my mom yells from the hallway that it's time to go to sleep. (parents are sooo evil, ne?) So, everyone settles down, the music goes off, and i provide sleeping bags and extra pillows for all. The girls set their sleeping bags on the floor in my room, while the guys put theirs just outside the bedroom door. It is now officially gossip time for the gals, and who knows what the guys are up to in the hallway...

_In the bedroom:_

Aeris: So what does everybody wanna do tomorrow?

Kaoru: I dunno... Maybe something to get Kenshin and i acquainted with this time period would be nice.

Noelle: OOOH!!! Let's go to the mall!

Aeris: Ooooh! Sounds like fun!

Kaoru: The "mall"?

Noelle: Yup yup. You could also call it a shopping center.

Kaoru: Oh! That does sound like fun!

All girls: (jump up and down) We're going to the mall! We're going to the mall! Yippee!

_In the hallway:_

Cloud: Oh no... This isn't a good sign... NO! They're gonna drag us to the mall!! Heaven help us!!

Kenshin: Oro? What's a "mall"?

Cloud: sweatdrop You don't know what a mall is?

Kenshin: No.

Cloud: It's a big place with lots of stores inside it. And girl's drag guys there to torture them.

Kenshin: Oro? How is shopping torture?

Cloud: sweatdrop IT JUST IS!!!

Kenshin: ORO!! OKAY!!

Cloud: Good. Now that that's settled... let's just get some sleep.

Kenshin: nods

Then, the boys lay down in their sleeping bags to sleep. The girls do the same inside the bedroom.

---------------------------

_The next morning:_

Kenshin comes into the bedroom and wakes up all the girls who are sleeping soundly and happily. First, he wakes up Aeris, who is agreeable to get up, but does that ever-so-slowly. Second, he went to Kaoru, who opened her eyes to look at him, then swatted at him to let her sleep a little longer. Kenshin sweatdropped, then decided on a new way to wake her up- kissing her. As soon as he kissed her, she opened her eyes and they had a tongue war to see if she would get to sleep longer; she lost, and she agreed to get up. Last was Noelle. Kenshin walked up to my bed and tapped my head to attempt to wake me up. That attempt failed miserably. Then, he shook me. That attempt also failed miserably. Then, Cloud came in and turned on my Karaoke machine. That attempt also failed quite miserably. They all sweatdropped. Then, Aeris and Kaoru tried to take away my covers. That also failed to wake me up. Then, Kaoru and Cloud rolled me off my bed. I still didn't wake up.

Kenshin: I hope she's not dead, that I do.

Cloud: The kid's gotta pulse, she's not dead yet.

Aeris: Maybe she went into a coma?

Kaoru: I don't think so. She's apparently just a really heavy sleeper.

Just then, a loud _crack!_ was heard as my acoustic guitar was smashed onto my head, and I awoke with a start.

Noelle: OW!!! OKAY!!!! WHICH ONE OF YOU DUMBASSES DESTROYED MY FRIGGIN GUITAR!!!!!!!!!!!?????!!!!!

All eyes turned to the culprit who was holding the remaining piece of my guitar, Kenshin.

Kaoru: KENSHIN!!!!

Kenshin: I had to wake her up Kaoru-dono!

Cloud: Wow. The guy's actually violent. Never woulda thought... Mr. "I won't kill for anything." I guess he will smash random crap on people though.

Aeris: Be quiet Cloud.

Cloud: Why?

Aeris: Because I said so, now SHUT UP!

Cloud: (cowers as Aeris raises her staff to hit him) Hai sugar.

Aeris: (lowers staff) Good boy.

Noelle: KENSHIN YOU BASTARD!!! YOU DESTROYED MY BELOVED GUITAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kenshin: ORO?! I'm sorry Noelle-dono!!! Gomen nasai!!! I didn't know it was of value to you. It was covered in dust after all, that it was.

Kaoru: Why was it covered in dust?

Noelle: He he... it was covered in dust cuz i never play it.

Kaoru: Why?

Noelle: Cuz I _can't_ play it. Sheesh...

Cloud: Well then why do you even _have_ it?

Noelle: Because I wanted it. And I thought that I might learn how to play it, but I'm too damn lazy to put forth the effort.

All: Oh.

Noelle: _BUT_ THAT DOESN'T GIVE KENSHIN THE RIGHT TO PICK IT UP AND SMASH IT ON MY HEAD!!!!!!!!!!! THAT THING WAS $75 BUCKS MAN!!!!!!!!!!!! AND I'M A BROKE PERSON FOR CHEESE'S SAKE!!!!!!!!!

Aer/Kao: EEEK! Calm down Noelle!

Noelle: Why? I have to give Kenshin his beating! He destroyed my guitar, and now he must pay for his crime!!

Kenshin: ORO! Please protect me Kaoru-dono! (runs behind Kaoru)

Kaoru: Don't hide behind me! I don't wanna get in the way of _your _beating!

Kenshin: But Kaoru-dono.... (looks at her with sad puppy eyes.) Onegai Kaoru-dono... don't let her beat me up... Please?

Kaoru: (practically melts at the absolutely adorable and innocent look on his face) ..... gulp o.... okay Kenshin.

Kenshin: Yay! Arigato Kaoru-dono! (jumps up and hugs her.)

Noelle: Aw!!! I give up! I can't hurt him; he's too damn cute! Geez... why did I have to bring the undeniably adorable baka rurouni here? He can get away with anything!

Kenshin: I like being able to get away with anything, that I do.

Kaoru: Of course you do you baka!

Kenshin: Oro?

Kaoru: sweatdrop Baka rurouni...

Kenshin: Oro? I'm not a baka Kaoru-dono, that I'm not.

Then, Kenshin's Battousai side comes out.

Battousai: You are to a baka, you baka rurouni.

Kenshin: Iie! I'm not.

Battousai: Hai you are!

Kenshin: Iie!

Battousai: Hai!

Kenshin: Iie!

Battousai: Hai!

Kenshin: sweatdrops This is so stupid, that it is... I'm arguing with myself....

Battousai: You're right, this is stupid. But _you're_ stupider!

Kenshin: No I'm not!

Battousai: Yes you are!

...Everybody watched as his eyes kept switching between amber and purple, and the words of both his sides kept pouring out of his mouth.

Cloud: Ooookaaay...... Does anybody else here think he's insane?

Aeris: I do.

Kaoru: I don't know...

Noelle: He's not insane.

Cloud: You have gotta be kidding me? If that's not insane, then I don't know what is.

Noelle: He has split-personality disorder you baka! He's not insane. And I've never seen anybody whose eyes change colors like that. THAT'S AWESOME!! If only he had a tail too, then I'd be really jealous.

Cloud: Why in the Planet's name would you want to have a tail?

Noelle: I LOVE tails! They are so AWESOME dude!

Aeris: I like tails too! Lol.

Kaoru: Um... I think they're insane just like Kenshin.

Cloud: You said it.

Back to Kenshin's struggle... Kenshin's rurouni side has just lost all control, and Battousai has emerged.

Battousai: I would rather you not call me insane koishii.

Kaoru: Well, you kinda are.

Noelle: OOOH!!!! Look at his eyes!! His eyes KICK ASS!!

Aeris: Literally or figuratively?

Noelle: Figuratively no duh. ....Hey wait a second! You sound just like my best friend! "Literally or figuratively?" AH!!! It's like a nightmare man; I can't avoid that question at school and I also can't avoid it here. CHEESE!

Cloud: What does cheese have to do with anything?

Noelle: It's just a random expression I use; it means the same thing as geez, i just say cheese instead sometimes.

Cloud: If charter was still open, that's where you'd belong.

Noelle: Nope; they'd kick me out cuz I'd be playing with matches and lighters all the time. I'm a pyromaniac. MWAHAHAHA!!

Battousai: Okay, you're not even _remotely_ evil, so you shouldn't be using an evil laugh. I'm a hell of a lot more evil than you are.

Noelle: Aw, bull shit. I can be _really_ evil.

Battousai: No, you can't.

Noelle: Yes I can.

Battousai: No.

Noelle: Yes.

Battousai: No!

Noelle: Yes!

Battousai: NO!

Noelle: YES to the infinite power!

Battousai: Huh? What the hell's that mean?

Noelle: sweatdrop Okay, you are _really_ stupid. Have you _ever_ taken a math class in your life?

Battousai: Math? What the hell is this "math"?

Noelle: My point is proven. Battousai may be a genius when it comes to swords, but when it comes to everything else, he's really, really _stupid_.

Battousai: Hey! That's an insult! I'm gonna kick your little girly ass for saying htat!

Noelle: Hey! I am NOT _girly_!!! I'm a rebel! I'm a punk! And I'm also gonna kick _your_ ass!

Battousai: Kiss my ass.

Noelle: Literally or figuratively?

Battousai: What?

Noelle: Literally or figuratively?

Battousai: Why are you asking me this?

Noelle: Because, if you meant it literally I would just puke up my non-existent breakfast on you. If not, then I'd kick your ass, literally.

Battousai: What part of what I said?

Noelle: When you said "Kiss my ass".

Battousai: Oh, figuratively.

Noelle: Okay. (smacks his head with his sakabato.)

Battousai: OW! You're gonna pay for that! (reaches down to grab his sword, but realizes that that was what Noelle hit him with.) Dammit! Gimme back my sword!

Noelle: "Gimme"-ers don't get what they want! You gotta say the magic word!

Battousai: What magic word?

Noelle: You know. The _magic word_.

Battousai: What is this "magic word"?

Kaoru: You baka, the magic word is _please_.

Battousai: Oh. Hey! I'm not gonna ask her to give me my sword back! I'm not so low that I have to ask some little girl to give me my sword!

Noelle: AHEM! If you haven't forgotten, _I'M_ the author! You can't really harm me, but I can harm you if i want to.

Battousai: You're bluffing.

Noelle: Nope! Here, I'll give you back your sword, then you can try to attack me with it.

Battousai: (takes the sword and charges at her. Just as the sword is about to hit her, the blade stops, and no matter how hard he tries, Battousai can't get the sword to go past the invisible barrier between her head and the sword. He gives up.) Dammit... That's not fair.

Noelle: Yeah well life's a bitch, so get over it.

Battousai: I probably know that better than you.

Noelle: Yeah, you probably do, but I come pretty close.

Battousai: Yeah right.

Noelle: Oh you are _so_ impossible.

Kaoru: Literally or figuratively?

Noel/Batt: NOT THIS _AGAIN_!!!

Kaoru: Anyways... This is actually quite amusing... you two fight like siblings.

Noel/Batt: NANI?!!

Kaoru: You fight almost just like Yahiko and I do.

Battousai: Now _that's_ a scary thought...

Kaoru: Maybe we could take her in just like we did Yahiko...

Noelle: Oooh... That'd be a lot better than living in the hell I'm living in right now. Sign me up!

Battousai: No WAY! She is _not_ coming home with us Kaoru!

Kaoru: Aw... but why not?

Noelle: Yeah, why not? You could be my really hot big brother.

Battousai: Okay... that's disgusting.

Noelle: Okay, I could be Kaoru's little sister instead then.

Kaoru: Yeah! That sounds like fun. But... did you really have to say that you think he's hot? I mean, he is MINE after all.

Noelle: He he... sorry sissy.

Kaoru: That's okay.

Aeris: Okay, so when are we gonna go to the mall?

Noelle: Oh yeah! We _were_ gonna do that weren't we?

Aeris: Yes, we were.

Cloud: NO! Please don't drag us to the mall... Please, have mercy...

Battousai: What's so bad about going to a f***ing mall?

Kaoru: KENSHIN!!! I didn't know you knew that word!

Battousai: I know many inappropriate words koishii, I just don't say them very often.

Kaoru: Oh. Well, try not to say that one anymore.

Battousai: Only for you koishii.

Kaoru: beaming with happiness Okey dokey! To the mall!

Noel/Aer: YAY!

Cloud: Somebody shoot me now...

Battousai: Literally or figuratively?

Cloud: Literally...

Battousai: ...You're strange... I wouldn't wanna get shot.

Cloud: Well you will when we get to the mall.

Battousai: Naw, you're probably just paranoid.

Cloud: Whatever...

--------------------------------------------------

~End Chapter 3~

Description of next chapter: The group goes to the mall! Yippee! Good for girls, bad for Cloud. Will Battousai enjoy the mall? Or will he hate it just as much as Cloud does? Find out, next time on Stuck In My World!

~Peace and Love

Reviews are always happily accepted! ^_____^


	5. Chapter 4

**Stuck In My World**

**by: Miss Battousai Noelle**

**Disclaimer: **see chapter one

**Author's Rant: **Let's see.. something to rant about... oh yeah, my rents took away my FFX game and gave it to my bro cuz i wouldn't let him play it yesterday, but that's about it. And you'd think I'd be more pissed off, ne? But, I've decided that I'm gonna give my brother a taste of his own medicine, mwahaha... evil grin So, wish me luck on my revenge endeavor against my spoiled rotten lil bro! 

**Chapter 4:**

At the mall, everybody has split into two groups, Kenshin & Kaoru went one way, while Cloud, Aeris, and I went in the other direction.

Kenshin & Kaoru:

Kenshin is still in Battousai mode, and is walking around, holding Kaoru's hand, and leading her away from clothing stores, and, instead, driving her towards candy shops.

Kaoru: "Kenshin!! I like candy, but I don't want you forcing me away from clothing shops!"

Battousai: "It'll be fine koishii; we don't need to go into a bunch of clothing stores."

Kaoru: "Stop being so mean! And besides, you want to fill me up with too much candy, cuz then I'll load up on too much food and start to get a little chubby."

He froze in mid-step.

Battousai: "Good point. No more candy shops for you."

Kaoru sighed.

Kaoru: "Can we at least go into _one_ clothing store? Onegai?"

Battousai: "All right... you win koishii."

Kaoru: "Yippee! Arigato!"

She bounced for a few seconds, planted a kiss on his cheek, and last, began leading him to the nearest clothing store.

Meanwhile.......

Cloud, Aeris, & Noelle:

Noelle: "Where are Kenshin and Kaoru?! They were supposed to meet us here in the food-court 20 minutes ago!!"

Cloud: "Beats me. Maybe they found something to do that was actually 'fun'. If you catch my drift..."

Aeris: "CLOUD STRIFE!!!"

Cloud: "Nani?"

Aeris: (whacks Cloud with her staff) "Baka hentai!!"

Cloud: "Ouch!! Sorry! Geez.... Women..... always so touchy...."

Aeris: (shoots a death glare at him) "What was that?"

Cloud: (sweatdrops while rubbing the back of his head) "He he... Nothing koishii. Nothing at all! He he..."

Aeris: (glares at him again, then turns away)

Cloud: "Phew...."

Noelle: (rolls her eyes) "Guys........"

Cloud: (pouts) "Shut up......"

Noelle sticks her tongue out at Cloud, just as Battousai and Kaoru appear into view and join the trio. Battousai now has a black leather, spiked collar around his neck, with a connected chain leash ending in Kaoru's right hand. He did _not _look happy in this predicament. Kaoru, however, beamed happily as she came up to the group, holding several shopping bags in her left hand. Aeris, Cloud, and I looked at the collar, and couldn't hold in our laughter.

Noelle: "AHA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!"

Cloud: "HAAAAA HAAAAAA HAAAAAAAA!!!!"

Aeris: "TEE HEE HEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!"

Battousai: "Shut up! You wouldn't be laughing if you were in the same situation I am."

Cloud: "HAAA haaaaaa! Sorry man... but it's just SO damn FUNNY!"

Battousai: (shoots Cloud a death glare)

Cloud: (shoots a death glare of equal scariness back at him)

About ten minutes later....

Noelle: "Okay you stupid guys. Enough of the display of testosterone-driven clashes of the egos."

Batt/Clo: (throw Noelle a death glare)

Noelle: (very high-pitched) "Eeeeeep!"

Batt/Clo: "Holy SHIT that was high-pitched!"

Noelle: "Heh heh...."

Cloud: "That nearly broke my eardrum that was so loud!"

Battousai: "Seriously..."

Noelle: "Heh heh... Sorry. Anyways! Where does everybody wanna go for lunch?"

Kaoru: "Well, i don't know about everybody else, but I'm really tired. I vote we go back to your place Noelle."

Battousai: "I'll have to agree with my koishii... i would much rather be at your house than be out in public with this damned collar around my neck......"

Aeris: "giggle yeah, I'm a little tired too."

Cloud: "Okay, that settles it then."

Noelle: "Okey dokey. Back to my place!"

Back at Noelle's house, everyone has just finished lunch, and Kenshin is back to his normal rurouni self (A/N: thank goodness!), when _ZAP!! _Lightning somehow mysteriously struck the whole house and knocked all of us out.

No one was sure exactly how long we were all out, but when we came to, we woke up in a totally different place.

Cloud: "Ouch... is everybody okay?"

Noelle: "I sure hope so."

Aeris: "I'm good here."

Kaoru: "I'm okay... Luckily I landed on something soft... ?!!!?!!"

Clo/Aer/Noel: "What?"

Kaoru: "Oops.... I landed on Kenshin, no wonder... blushes"

Kenshin: "Orooooo......."

Noelle: "Ok, this isn't cool, where are we? Hold on a sec... this is quite familiar..."

Kaoru: "You mean these rocks are all familiar? What's wrong with you?"

Cloud: "She's right. This is all too familiar. We're at the Northern Crater!"

Aeris: "We are? Well, I guess i wouldn't know since Sephiroth killed me before I could go there so, oh well."

Ken/Kao: "You died??!?"

Aeris: "Uh, yeah... haven't you ever heard of resurrection? What Planet did you two come from?"

Noelle: "Uh Aeris, they came from the _real _world, where there's no such thing as dragons and resurrection spells and crap like that."

Aeris: "Bummer... So, is there magic where you come from?"

Kenshin: "Not that I know of..."

Noelle: "In my world there is a form of black magic, but all it ever does is damn you and come back to kill you in the end, so, i guess not really. Most magick in real life are just duds that basically are self-esteem boosters."

Kaoru: (raises an eyebrow) "And how might you know all that?"

Noelle: "Just call me the crazy research girl. I love researching mystical stuff like that. ^-^ "

Kaoru: "Anyways... how do we get out of here?"

Aeris: "Yeah sugarplum, lead the way out!"

Cloud: "No prob. I just don't want anybody screaming, or shrieking, when we run across any monsters."

Aeris: "What about if we run into any Tonberrys? Can we shriek at how cute they are?"

Noelle: "Ooooo! I LOVE Tonberrys! They are soooo adorable!"

Kaoru: "What's a... 'Tonberry'?"

Aeris: "Oh, you'd love them! They look kinda like really big turtles that can walk on their hind legs, and they carry tiny lamps in one of their hands..."

Cloud: (mocking Aeris's excitement) "...And they have a big butcher knife that they're just _dying_ to cut you up with..."

Aer/Noel: "CLOUD!!!"

Just then, a loud growl was heard from a little ways behind the group. Kaoru immediately jumped into Kenshin's arms.

Kaoru: "EEEEEP!!"

Cloud: "I said no squealing!"

Noelle: "No you didn't, If I recall correctly you said: "I just don't want anybody screaming, or shrieking, when we run across any monsters." That's what you said smarty-pants."

Cloud: "Oh shut up. We need to get moving if we don't want it to catch up to us."

Kaoru: "You heard him Kenshin, giddyap. Get movin' all ready"

Kenshin: "Demo, Kaoru-dono... I can't move very fast while I'm carrying you, that I can't."

Kaoru: "Hmph! Fine! Jerk..."

Kaoru hopped down and followed everyone else up the winding stone staircase.

---------------------------------------------

~End Chapter 4

Will the monster catch up with the group before they can get out of the crater? Or will the group be forced to kick its ass? Stay tuned to find out on the next episode of Stuck In My World!

~Peace and Love!

~Miss Battousai Noelle


	6. Chapter 5

**Stuck In My World**

**by: Miss Battousai Noelle**

**Disclaimer: **see chapter one

**Author's Rant: **Hiya everybody!!! I'm in a good mood can ya tell? - So it's Christmas break and I have an all day party thing for the Encores (our school's top show choir) tomorrow and I am hyped!! Plus I'm a lil bit high offa nailpolish remover but that's a different story... So... here's more random funny crap from this random funny story. Enjoy!

**Chapter 5:**

Noelle: "Phew! We finally reached the end of that spirally thingy!"

Cloud: "Please, we're not even CLOSE to being out of here yet."

Noelle: sniff "You didn't have to say it like that... Big meanie..."

Cloud: rolls eyes "Would somebody puh-leaze shut the kindergartener up?"

Noelle: "I take offense to that. I'm a _third grader_ at heart."

Cloud: "Well _excuse me_."

Aeris: pushes Cloud out of her way "You're excused."

Kaoru: glaring "Can we HURRY IT UP ALREADY!!! I kinda wanna get _outta_ here before that monster shows up!"

Cloud: "Hold your horses chica, we'll get out when we get to the exit."

Kenshin: "Or until we get zapped someplace new again."

Cloud: "Or that."

Kaoru: crying "I wanna leave NOW!"

Aeris: clutching Cloud's arm "Do I ever cry like that?"

Cloud: avoiding eye contact "No, never, honey."

Noelle: "Yeah, I wanna leave too..."

Aeris: "I agree."

Cloud: "So then stop whining like little babies and let's get moving."  
All Girls: "YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO SAY IT LIKE THAT!!!"

------------------------------------------------

Five minutes later...

Aeris: "Are we there yet?"

Cloud: "No."

Kaoru: "How much farther?"

Cloud: "We're not even halfway there."

Noelle: "I want some ice cream..."

Cloud: "......"

Aeris: "I'm thirsty."

Cloud: "......."

Kaoru: "I'm tired."

Cloud: "......."

Kenshin: "This place is so strange..."

Cloud: "WOULD EVERYBODY SHUT UP ALREADY!!!!" He ran over to the girls. "STOP YOUR FREAKIN COMPLAINING!!!!" then ran over to Kenshin, "AND YOU, STOP COMMENTING ABOUT HOW ODD, STRANGE, BIZARRE, UNNATURAL, AND AWKWARD THIS PLACE IS!!!!!!!!"

Everyone was silent.

Crickets chirping 

Suddenly there was a deafening roar from behind everyone.

Cloud: "Oh shit."

Kaoru: "Eeeeeek!!"

Kenshin: pulls out his sakabato "It seems the monster has caught up with us."

Noelle: "Isn't it ironic that when we finally got quiet the monster showed up?"

Cloud: "Shut it."

Aeris: "Well she's right you know."

Cloud: "Geez... is everyone against me now?"

All: "Yup."

Monster: "Roar!! I am a monster and I am here to eat you all!"

Everyone jumped.

Noelle: "It talks... that is so lame."

Monster: "Roar!! Of course I can talk? What kinda monster do think I am?"

Noelle: "Some really lame one who talks."

Monster: goes through an odd voice change "Oh, c'mon! You people are NO fun at all."

Aeris: recognizes the voice "Cid? Is that you?"

Cloud: "You know, that does sound an awful lot like Cid."

Cid: comes out from behind a giant rock "Damn... I was hopin you wouldn't figure it out..."

He popped a cigarette into his mouth before walking up to Cloud and slapping his back.

Cid: "So how's it going Spike?"

Cloud: "......."

Cid: "You sure didn't sound too happy a minute ago, yelling at your buddies an' all..."

Cloud: "Oh shut up Cid."

Cid: "Puh-leaze... you know me better'n that! You know it takes a helluva lot more to get me to shut up! Ha ha!"

Aeris: shakes her head "Ok, you can shut up now Cid."

Cid: grins "That ain't gonna work Pink."

Aeris: "Grr!!"

Noelle: "OH PUT A SOCK IN IT CID!!" shoves a newly materialized pair of socks into his mouth "Much better! -"

Kaoru: "How'd you do that???"

Noelle: "Do what?"

Cloud: "Materialize a pair of socks out of nowhere?"

Noelle: "Huh? Oh, I dunno. WAIT! Maybe my magical author powers are still working! YES!!!"

Kenshin: "Then why didn't you use them earlier?"

Noelle: "I figured that they would be all dead and stuff since we're not in my world anymore."

Cloud: "She's the typical blonde..."

Noelle: "If you haven't forgotten big brother, _you_ are a blonde too."

Cid: "I'm lost... She's your sister?"

Aeris: "Yes and no."

Cid: "Huh?"

Cloud: "It's complicated..."

Cid: "Wait... has she been injected with Jenova cells too?"

Noelle: "No I have not!"

Cid: "Is she biologically your sister?"

Cloud: "No, she's just a girl we met that has the same hair color and eye color as me, so she was dubbed as my little sister."

Cid: "Creepy..."

Aeris: "How's it creepy?"

Kaoru: "Yeah, what if they actually are siblings, but one was just magically sent to another world and raised there instead?"

Noelle: "Please let me be the adopted one... _please_ let me be the adopted one..."

Cloud: "Please, how could she be related to me? She's insane."

Cid: "Hey, if I recall correctly _ you_ went insane not long after Pink here died; had some sorta identity crisis thing where you thought you were Zoe or whatever his name was."

Cloud: "His _name_ was _Zack_ and he was my _best friend_."

Cid: "So? You still thought you were him. Get over it: you're completely mental."

Aeris: "Wait a sec-- You and Zack were best friends? But you told me you didn't know anybody named Zack in SOLDIER."

Cloud: "Oh... crap. I kinda... uh... forgot to fill you in after you came back."

She slapped him.

Aeris: "You really are mental."

Noelle: grins happily "Yay!! That means that I'm not really related to my family back home! They're really weird even by my standards." dances around singing "Cloud's my big brother! Cloud's my big brother! Yippee!!"

Kenshin: "Yes... I must agree. They are both mentally handicapped."

Kaoru: grabs Kenshin's ear "Who are you to talk?? Mr. Ex-Assassin who is over-polite, laundry-obsessed, and just plain dumb most of the time?!?!"

Noelle: sweatdrops "Okay... I think we're all mental..."

Cloud: "Pretty much."

Aeris: "Even I'll admit that I'm crazy too... But that's why Cloud loves me, right Cloudy?"

Cloud: "Yeah, uhhu. Whatever you say."

------------------------------------------------

End Chapter 5

Yeah... now that it's been settled that everyone in this story is mentally ill one way or another... In the next chapter we shall hopefully find out why Cid is in the Northern Crater to begin with and what other totally mental adventures await us.

See ya next time!


End file.
